Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Vicious Waves

This summer has not been the easiest. It in fact has been quite stressful and filled with anxiety. But among your misfortune you must count your blessings. I am fortunate to have a family that holds me close and loves me as well as a boyfriend that does the same. I have fallen out of touch with a lot of my friends but they know who they are and I know who they are and no matter what time or what year it is that forever friendship will always be there. This past weekend I was fortunate enough to take a break from my summer school mentality and visit some family that live in California. In that time we were able to visit Huntington Beach. 

The waves were so rough they literally knocked me off my feet more than once. Among the vicious waves I caught a glimpse of a small sail boat far in the distance. How melancholic I thought . . .  but also how right it felt to see it. When I was younger I use to resonate with sail boats. I know it is a bit weird but hear me out. Sail boats can only really hold one person maybe three at most if it is a bigger one. Throughout my years of life . . . I always use to think about life as the sea and me as the little sail boat that could. No matter how rough the waves are and how dangerous the creatures of the deep are it was me and my little sail boat. It was up to me to fight the high waves. At the end of the day it is just you. You know yourself best and you know what is the best for you. You know what you can and cannot handle. My little sail boat is the significance of that thought of that mentality. Even though I personify myself as this small sail boat I know my will is bigger than the ocean. It is empowering to be able to fight through everything life throws at you but it is also respectful to seek help when you need it. In the end I try hard to keep my little sail boat from sinking or being consumed by the waves. I fight and succeed, fight and succeed. Fight and accept that sometimes there are leaks but there is nothing that can't be fixed unless you give up. 

The ending of my summer classes is coming up . . . tomorrow actually and through all the vicious waves there is now clarity. This nice moment of peaceful clarity. So when I saw that sail boat of in the distant sailing smoothly among the harsh waves I thought to myself . . .these hard times will pass and then I will look like that . . . I will feel like that. Peaceful and ready for what's to come. 


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