Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Miscellaneous December Essentials


Okay, bare yourselves sweet rose petals cause this is going to be quite a different post. Well, that you are use to anyways, I as well am excited and nervous! But here goes!

So I thought it would be a good idea to gather up some miscellaneous items in which I have been using through out the month of December . . . so that is what I did! Through this little bunch of picks I kept in mind that maybe since I used them so much during this month and they worked incredibly well for me maybe they too can for you. :) 

The first essential you see is a candle! But not just any candle . . . A Blueberry Pancakes candle. This scent is one I buy all year round but something about the "winter" time makes it my first pick. That and any Coffee scented or Vanilla Peppermint. Mmmm there's also this Pecan one that smells really good, but overall anything BLUEBERRY.


What would December be without the need of something moisturizing. Now you must be wondering 'Wild Citrus Sunflower' isn't that for like summer? Technically yes . . . but I'm a little strange in the sense that sometimes I like to remember what summer smells like during the winter. A wonderful body lotion from Bath and Body Works nonetheless.
Moving on to the St. Ives body scrub. This is literally my secret for clean fresh skin. During the colder months my skin is quite dry therefore this scrub takes off that dead layer of skin that is not very glamorous whatsoever. (There is also other versions of this scrub depending on your skin / What you are hoping to achieve with it).


I think my lips suffer the most during December. During this month these were my go to lip products for sure. The EOS vanilla mint balm, Vaseline lip therapy, and for the more fancier days the L'Oreal Colour Riche Balm in the shade Nourishing Nude. All these products are heaven for my lips, but I do use them under different circumstances. Obviously the Colour Riche Balm is a tinted balm, nude, with some shimmer to it. (Perfect) Vaseline lip therapy is definitely for severely chapped lips and the EOS one is for moderately chapped lips. 


Tea!!!! I'm obsessed all year round . . . there's no denying that. But during this month I think my favorite would have to be this one by Yogi. It smells great, tastes great, makes me feel all warm inside, and the sweet inspirational quotes that come on the little tag add the extra sparkle. Yes, I'll go with that . . . sparkle. 


Last but not least, my poetry journal, a good pen, and a book. For a while now I've really been wanting the Sharpie Pen, don't ask, but boy is it an amazing pen. A good cup of coffee or tea and a sitting with my journal on cold afternoons are always desired. Also a good read, currently I'm reading A Little Something Different by Sandy Hall. So far so GOOD. (I see a book review in the distance)....


And lastly what would cold winds be without a good ol' infinity scarf to tie everything together. This is my choice; navy with subtle white. Also not mentioned above is the Organix cocunut milk. (The image somehow deleted from my SD card, oops). This oil is not only good for dry hair but it's great in nourishment. Meaning longer hair I'm on my way! Also Anti-Breakage, that is always a plus. 

Anyways I hope this sort of post sat well with you guys, let me know what you think. I hope you all enjoy the last days of this year. Be safe!

And as always I hope this helped in more ways than none. 

See you later.

Monday, December 1, 2014

Playlist

I have a feeling this might be one of the most themelessless playlist I might ever make. But that's okay, sometimes we feel that way, like we have no exact us with us all the time. in a good way of course. This is one of those times.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Okay, well there's some country in there, some pop, indie, acousitc, and who knows what else. Hopefully something you like. But pretty much these have been my go to songs the past two weeks. . . I don't know, I've been feeling a little weird I guess. In a good way though. Anyways I'm thinking next blog post will be a little emotion to pick away at then, weekly essentials, then maybe another book review, then maybe a little somethin' different. :)
 
I hope you are all doing well!
 
See You Later.



Sunday, November 23, 2014

A In My Dreams Book


I've been meaning to do a book review on this book for so long now that I nearly almost just forgot. (Hold your applause, please there's no need). But seeing it there on my shelf I thought you know what it's now or literally never . . . so I picked up my camera threw the book in a bush and snapped a picture of it and so here we are. Book review! 

Tiger's Curse is the first book out of the series by Colleen Houck. Before I get started I need to "fangirl" for a moment as you say. I feel a deep connection to this book simply because if I where to write a book I feel like it would run along the lines of this one. I remember being half way through when I just stopped reading in amazement and therefore in need of air. My sister was in the room at the time so she didn't know whether to call for help or let my moment pass. She let it pass and I told her "this book is in my head right now."  I am just now realizing how traumatizing all of that kind of was . . . sorry sister, I'm very sorry. Of course my ideas are different, I guess what I'm trying to say is the style of writing, fiction, the whole one day you're normal the next day you're on some crazy mission ordeal. That's a in my dreams book. 

Anyways now to get to the actual book. Basically this book will swoon you. It will intrigue you, it will confuse you, it will occasionally anger you. It will definitely scare you and unease you. There are two (three) main characters Kelsey and Dhiren a.k.a. Ren. (By far the sexiest name ever given to a main character if you ask me). ... Kelsey a naive young girl looking for work luckily finds a temporary one at a circus. She gets to do many things but the coolest of all is she gets to help out with a tiger called Ren. Mhm . . . that main character Ren. From then on it's all in due time that she finds out about the curse. And boy is that curse a whirlwind. This part of the book I admire so much simply because the author put so much amount of work into detail. The way it all plays out, it's perfect. Kelsey finding out, the explanation, the quest. Kelsey is the one to help break the tiger's curse. See what I mean one day you're normal the next day you're the chosen one. (I'm still waiting for a tiger to show up at my door . . . no pressure though). 

I don't want to give away all the things that are exciting to find out about. So I will say this, once everything is out in the open the rest of the book takes place in India. Most of the time the jungles in India. And if you can just imagine being on a quest with a beautiful ferocious white tiger at your side fighting off all sorts of magic and mysteries all whilst throwing a little romance in there. This book is something you dream of and wish you would wake up to in real life. 

Now the ending of the book, is harsh, hurtful, painful to read, and watch play out in your head. I cried, I very much cried. Let's just say you want to shake a certain character till they realize a certain something. The quest continues on to the next book properly titled Tiger's Quest. This book was the simple and the easy even if it seemed it wasn't at all that. What comes next, well let's just say what comes next does not compare. 

If you've read the book let me know what your thought on it are! 

See you later.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Exhaustion with Oneself

It's not an exact emotion but more a feeling, the feeling of being just fed up. Fed up with everything that pertains to you. Starting this blog I didn't want it to be so sad, I go back and look at all my heartfelt post and I ask myself but why are you always talking so sad?
I now know why and it's taken me awhile to actually come to terms with it and admit it let alone accept it, actually I don't think I've accpeted it yet. But, there's time.

Anyways the exhaustion I feel towards myself has reached it's breaking point. I don't really know what the purpose of this post is anymore. I guess what I'm trying to say is this disgust at every action, every thought, and every movement is moreover taking control of me. it's debilitating seeing everything go downhill almost from an outer body experience, if that makes sense. I feel like I've been having tons of those lately, like I'm watching someone else live inside my body. I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm not okay, but I'm trying to not completely lose it. So, just be patient with me. I'm going to try to save this now sour rose bubble and make it sweet again. That obviouosly starts with working on myself a bit. Or a lot . . . I hope you are all doing much better.


See You Later.

Monday, September 22, 2014

Playlist


                               

I know what you must be thinking . . . nearly a month of absence and you think coming back with a simple playlist is going to get you off the hook? Think again sweet rose think again. I figure that sometimes the best way to explain how one is feeling is through music. And in this month of disappearance all I've been doing is feeling. Like John Green says, "That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt." I knew if I decided on an emotion to peel away at I would be writing a novel, under the umbrella of emotions there is many, and I have been feeling more than many, so if it where one I would have to choose it would be . . . overwhelmed. I don't think I've mentioned this in a blog post before but I have anxiety/panic attacks, mild depression that comes and goes when it wants, and chronic worry. Most of the time I fight through it but I'm only human and there's only so  much I can do before it all catches up with me. This month of absence was all of that catching up with me. It is not an excuse I know that, but it sure is a weakening strength that I haven't quite conquered yet. Anyways, during this time I've been reading some books, listening to music, watching movies, sucking at school, and pretty much just hiding away. So be prepared to hear about it all in some way through here. If you want of course . . . no pressure. 

Okay, now for the playlist. Before I start listing off these songs I want you to keep in mind several things. Don't take some of these songs so literal and some do take so literal. Meaning, there's more to just the lyrics to explain what one is feeling, keep in mind the melodies, the instruments, the musicality, the harmonies, all those aspects have been painting a picture to my feelings and thoughts sometimes more than the words could ever do so. And in some songs the lyrics are exactly what my heart feels. This playlist is not entirely hopeless nor hopeful, it's kind of somewhere in between. And somewhere in between is where I'm most comfortable. 














This time I didn't put any description or opinion under each title for the simple fact that each one of these songs is no doubt going to make you feel something. And I want that something to be perceived in your own words and way. And also if you haven't noticed each one of these are also links that either lead to official videos or just lyrical videos on YouTube. 

Pain is a pesky part of being human, I’ve learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. Pain is a sudden hurt that can’t be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.
— C. JoyBell C.

Well my sweet reader I hope this helped in more ways than none. Enjoy the music, enjoy your own company. 

See you later.

Monday, August 18, 2014

Distressed

Well, well, well. It's been quite awhile since we have had a heart to heart talk my sweet reader. I reckon you've been avoiding it just as much as I have. It's okay no harmed feelings. Sometimes it's okay to shy away and deal with things face to face and on your own. And then again sometimes it's not. So here I am! Today we shall talk about distress.

Distress - Great pain, anxiety, or sorrow; acute physical or mental suffering; affliction; trouble.

There's no way to sugar coat that. I want to say I have been feeling quite blue this past week and I couldn't put a finger on what that emotion was called. Then I thought about princesses and the word came to me quickly. I'm quite distressed. I feel like a headless chicken running around in circles; I'm not dying and I'm not living either. *well that escalated quickly. 

Being distressed isn't as glamorous as it seems. No matter what princess acts it out. No one is really going to come and save you, the only one to do that is yourself. But even then that takes awhile too. 

Being distressed means having no answer, no solution. To anything really. And it sucks! There's no other way to put it, it sucks it sucks. You feel hopeless, dumbfounded, aggravated, overall stupid. (Again, headless chicken.) All emotions demand to be felt. That we all know, being distressed it sorta comes with it, you don't know what to do, you don't know what to say, you don't know how to fix it, you sit there, blank. And all you do is feel. You feel the pain, the anxiety, the sorrow, the suffering. You feel it all. Next thing you know you are a ball of nerves and the veins in your neck are about to choke you and you don't know weather to explode or pass out. I wish I can turn this emotion around and find some sort of faith in it, but really any sort of happiness/joy you try to affiliate with distress is fake. It's that fake smile, fake laugh, fake everything we do to try and cover it up. 

I over think things, I sometimes under think things. Sometimes I think of nothing and I feel like a complete failure because I should be thinking of something. Something to improve my life, enhance it, enjoy it, live up to it, be successful with, I should be thinking of something instead of nothing. Sometimes everything is a bit overwhelming and no one else is at fault but ourselves. It sounds a bit harsh and all, but we put ourselves in this position we sike ourselves out. I mean there is a reason the word stress is in the word distress. We put a crazy amount of pressure on ourselves, to be the ideal person we want to be as well as the person other people hope for us to be. 

The trick is getting through your fit in one piece and casually shaking it off afterwards. Huge emphasis on *casually. And then ask; Okay, what did I learn from my moment of complete darkness and distress? This is where you surprise yourself because even if moments ago you were completely blank in the head, after everything settles . . . you learn a lot. Not always do you know what the solution is but you know what it is you need at the moment. Even it's something as simple as a cup of tea or a nap. Make sure that is fulfilled. Baby steps aren't just for babies! I'm a huge advocate of that. Usually the things you are stressed about end up being very common things to be stressed about. It's comforting to know people embark the same fits as you do. I mean it sucks, but it makes your crazy self feel a little normal. 

I feel better I got all of that out. Another great example of what to do. UNLOAD YOUR LOAD. Yes, I know that sounds a bit vulgar but we are talking about a specific kind of load. The load that is on your shoulders and weighing heavily on your heart. Although extinguishing the other type of load would also be a good stress extinguishing help. *again, that escalated quickly. It's okay we are in our sweet little bubble you and me . . . we can talk about this stuff shamelessly. (poop) Anywaysssssss, a way to feel everything less heavy to carry, talk about it, write about it, sing about it, dance about it, cry about it, sleep about it, eat about it (not too much), any way that you feel yourself have less and less to feel anxious and worried about, do it. 


Well my sweet reader, I hope this has helped in more ways than none. I send you a huge warm hug. And remember . . . we all go a little mad sometimes. 




See You Later.


Monday, August 11, 2014

Playlist

Hello there. It's been a little while. *awkward chuckle Okay it's been two weeks, it's kinda my fault and kinda not. I hope you all have been having good days and enjoying what is left of summer or the first couple days of school. Either way here are some songs to help you take all of that in.

I really like this song because of the vibe it sets, but the video especially makes me smile. A lot. Cats.
Mmmmmmm the beats, oh the beats in this song. Makes me want to dance away in oblivion.
There's so much to say about this song, there is so much meaning behind it. I can't help but to think of it as an anthem for women. If the words don't already make you feel some type of way the video sure will. Also this song I dedicate to all of you girlies reading this, especially one in particular, you know who you are.
Sia you never seize to amaze me, all of her music is just . . . just . . there's no word for it. Her voice will grasp your soul and it will be the best feeling ever.
Stay With Me - Sam Smith
I can't believe that such a soulful voice comes from Sam, he doesn't look like one to carry it. But boy does he. His voice is like butter. Yep that's how I'm going to explain it. Butter.
A song worth repeating. Over and over and over again.
A soothing song, for the good ol' aching soul. I do admit if I let myself dive into this song fully, the tears stream down my face. Good tears nonetheless.


Well my sweet reader I hope these songs help you in more ways than none when it comes to getting through the week. Or getting through anything really, I think there's a little message within every single one. 

See You Later

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Playlist

Yes I am aware it is not Monday. I kinda forgot yesterday was Monday . . . I know we all don't really like Monday's so the question is; how could you forget such a horrible day? I don't know I guess I had a good Monday. *gasps 

Anyways since the playlist I posted last Monday is literally still on repeat I thought I would do a different kind of playlist. A playlist of quotes. Would that make it a reading list? *wonders A quote for each day to get you through the week. These quotes will be coming from my journal. Either quotes I write or quotes I write down from other places that I like to keep with me. Quotes that help me, inspire me, and take care of me. 


Tuesday
This is the first quote I have in my current poetry journal. I had an online class once and through it I met Gary. He is quite aged but that didn't stop him from giving school another chance as well as giving life another chance. After getting to know Gary a little more and him getting to know me we never met. But he did leave me with these last words for our online class came to an end. I never met him, probably never will but he impacted my life greatly with these words. Still they help me.

"All great music, poetry, and art come from a place of pain, hurt, or abundant love. These are the things people experience in life. To touch people with your gift you need to touch their souls. Hang in there, take each event, good or bad, as a lesson. the growing is in the passing through these periods. One day you will wake up and know who you are, until then hang on for the ride."
- Gary Martin
~
Wednesday
Who would I be if I didn't put one of Morrie's quotes in here. Tuesday's With Morrie by Mitch Albom is one of my favorite books. A true story, such a raw story. I feel like that book has helped me and made me a better me. I have tons of quotes by Morrie in my journal. Without him I don't know where I'd be. Anyways this one of the ones I have memorized. Simply because it is relevant to every day life. It helps me understand. This quote is also one of my inspirations for all the emotions I write about.

"But by drowning yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your head even, you experience them fully and completely. You know what love is. You know what grief is. And only then can you say, all right, I have experienced that emotion. Now I recognize that emotion. Now I need to detach from that emotion for a moment."
- Morrie Schwartz
~
Thursday
This is something I wrote.

"I woke up today and told myself - Live up to your words. And make yourself better.
Not for anyone else but yourself."
-Rosa
~
Friday
This is also something I wrote.

"I don't want to give up on myself. Out of all my struggles I think that's the one I'm having most trouble with. Why? I ask myself the same question. But then again not all battles end. Why should this one? Maybe this one is meant to go on for a life time. My lifetime. I think it will. And I think I'm strong enough for it. That is what baffles me most of all."
-Rosa
~
Saturday
I'm a huge Grey's Anatomy fan. If you haven't watched that show I highly recommend it, it's not just about doctor stuff it's about life. I am more than sure one if not all the episodes will make you cry.

"Whatever it is you are feeling, it is okay."
-Meredith
~
Sunday

"On a whim of inspiration one must just go. One must just do. In a world where you are applauded and ridiculed for being you all at the same time; what is it you are suppose to do? Be you, be you."
-Rosa

Well my sweet reader I hope that helped in more ways than none. Enjoy these little bits and pieces that help me along with my days.

See you Later.
  




Sunday, July 27, 2014

A Troublesome Book


Well it certainly has been awhile since the last book review. To think I would have done a billion by now, but nope. There is no excuse for not reading, well there is one. Laziness. Other than that I had been doing a lot of traveling and reading a book during that time was a hard thing to do. Being home now I can go back to my little reading routine.

This week I finished the book Matched by Ally Condie. I was so unsure whether I was going to be able to finish it or not. Why? It has a very slow start, I almost felt like the book didn't start till it was about to end. That slow start is very important though, it's where you pretty much get all the basic info yet critical info you need to understand the rest of the book. Nonetheless I'm glad I stuck with it and finished it till the end. Keep in mind this book is the first in its trilogy. Oh yes, trilogy. Something inside me gets very happy and joyous when I find out there are several books more continuing the story. That and I always think there is a cliffhanger at the end of the book so that gets me sorta pumped to keep reading and find out what it is. The thing about this book it doesn't really have a cliffhanger, but it does make you want to keep reading it. *magical book dun dun dun. One thing I really loved about this book was the uniqueness of all the characters names. Cassia, Ky, Xander, Em, Bram, and the list goes on. (Those are just some of the characters)  Pretty badass if you ask me. 

Anyways now you may be asking what exactly is this book about? I might get eaten alive for this but  . . . this book reminded me a lot of Divergent. Now just hear me out . . . it is not at all exactly like Divergent, they just share one huge aspect. The whole the government is in control sorta thing and you have no choice but to follow what the government says sorta thing. Well it's sorta like that. Keeping that in mind, this society has everything very well thought out and researched, they have eliminated cancer, the adequate age to die is at 80, the age to stop having children is at age 31, the age to be matched is after 17 years of age. Matched? Yes, the society matches you with your ideal partner. The book tells the story of Cassia, starting with her match banquet. Finding out she got matched with her best friend Xander should be something to celebrate. Given that most get matched with complete strangers. After the banquet you get a micro card with all of your partners info, Cassia in the comfort of her home goes through the micro card and surely enough there is Xanders face . . . but at the very last second another face pops up on the screen. Ky. And so the story takes of from there. . . 

Are you going to purchase the next book? Um, yes. I need to know what happens! It may have a slow start but once you dive into this world there is no going back. Plus I do have to admit that there where some parts that got me right in the heart and made me feel the feels. *smooth, I now leave you with some little bits and pieces from the book (quotes) Enjoy! 


"My fingers smell like soil and my lips taste like sugar and I'm so awake right now I wonder if I'll be able to sleep tonight."

"My one step forward becomes many steps back." 

"I'm not anyone. I'm just one of the people who happened to fall in the majority. All my life, the odds have been on my side." 

"Do not go gentle."

See you later.

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Encouragement and Discouragement

Encouragement - The action of giving of someone support, confidence, or hope. 

Discouragement - An attempt to prevent something by showing disapproval or creating difficulties; dispiritedness.



Encouragement is something we need on a daily basis, even for the smallest of things. Should I buy this top? Should I talk to this boy? Should I cut my hair this way? Should I really be this way or that? Should I really blow my nose in public? (We all know the need and embarrassment that is). Sometimes our own encouragement is enough, our own encouragement is all we need. Yeah right . . . Even the most confident and proudest person needs encouragement, encouragement from friends or even their mother. What am I kidding especially their mother.  

But how come you are talking about encouragement and discouragement in the same post? Contradicting much? 

No, not really, wherever there is encouragement sadly there is discouragement. I combine both words because I know what it's like to feel both at the same time.

Compliments, smiles, a shine in your eyes, a pat on the back, a hug, kind words, all such things are what people familiarize with encouragement. All those things provide that little push we need to just go after our dreams and have those dreams be our greatest endeavors. Dreams aren't these sort of hallucinations we have, they are these visions our heart, soul, and mind try to encourage our spirit to follow. They are little signs from within. Who we surround ourselves with, what we surround ourselves with, our environment; all those things are such great contributing factors to the encouragement we receive as well as the discouragement we receive. I guess what I'm trying to say in the jumble of all these words is; look around you, accept all positivity. I mean don't just accept it, feel it, let it travel through your body, by doing so it will radiate such a great feeling all around you. That's how encouragement works by accepting it. Cause if you're anything like me and don't really know how to take compliments and all . . . stop. Believe. That's all there is to it. Heck, this blog was created with tons of encouragement, if you're reading this, you're encouraging me.

Encouragement is a domino effect. Positively speaking of course. It effects the other and the other and the other making them feel better and better. :)

Discouragement on the other hand is the complete opposite and can just literally tare you to pieces and eat you up inside. Sometimes the excuse for such thing is simply jealousy, hatred, blindness, and all the other reasons why people discourage others and make them feel bad. I mean they're not bad people, maybe sometimes without knowing we have discouraged someone, we aren't bad people. I mean a little inconsiderate and selfish at the time . . . *raises hand . . . but we aren't bad people. That doesn't give us the excuse to crush other people's dreams. So encourage them even if their dreams sound a bit crazy or out of reach, only they can decide which ones come true. We all come to our senses at some point, well hopefully. 


I guess the most important thing I can say in this whole entire post is as simple as 1 2 3.
Don't give up.
As worn out and as cheesy as that sounds it's the truest thing when it comes to achieving something. Encourage yourself as much as you encourage others. It's a cycle we must keep alive somehow, so follow your dreams. You already have people supporting in more ways than one. As Disney as this sounds, dreams do come true. 





See you later.

Thank you. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

Playlist

Laundry, laundry, and laundry. That's what this day has consisted of. Also a lot of sweat in the midst of it all. Music is the only thing that has been keeping me company today, yes I know that sounds tragic and lonesome, but it happens. But to keep it short here is this weeks playlist. 

Warning; you might have several of these on repeat . . . as I did. They were on repeat . . . a lot. 


Hug me just hug me, it's a hug me and sway with me type song.
A song for a happy moment.
A song for a sad romantic moment.
One you've probably heard, but always great to hear again.
One to make you feel better about your life when you feel it's at a stand still. 
Oh the feels . . .
Thanks to my sister, this song is one of the "replay" ones.
Oh and so is this one. 
Yes, just yes. Dace, feel it, smile, do it all. *heart flutters
Now for a little sexy Spanish tune. We need a little spice every now and then, don't deny yourself of such luxury. Shake those hips!


I hope you all enjoy this playlist as much as I am, and probably will for the rest of the week. I have a repeatsamesong problem. Shameless I am shameless. Anyways, sweet reader I hope these songs make you feel the feels as well as feel better. :)

See you Later. 

Sunday, July 20, 2014

Hello Again!

To say I missed this little bubble will not suffice. Really, I was itching to get back to my laptop and start writing away again. Although the time away was very needed, being over there I couldn't help but feel like it was a new beginning for me. And new beginnings sometimes take time. I'm truly blessed to have had the opportunity to go and visit my family as well as have tons of fun while doing so. (I'm counting down the days till I get to go again) Being back to my little hometown of Phoenix, Arizona all I can say is; better things are coming my way, I just know it, I feel it in my guts! 

Anyways, I hope you have all been well. I will be getting back to my little routine of posting, if what I'm doing is even considered a routine. *I'm not a mess just scatter brained, tis all. 

See You Later.


Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Sheepish

Are you calling yourself a sheep? No, I am not. Are you calling me a sheep? Ye . . . No, I am not. Do you feel sheepish? Yes, I kinda do and you maybe do too.

Sheepish - embarrassed or bashful, as by having done something wrong or foolish. 

When I read the definition of this emotion, I couldn't quite fully understand it. Grasp the idea of it. So what I think of, the best I can think of it, is to envision this emotion as a shy little sheep that is self conscious about everything it does and no matter what, it feels more than embarrassed than it should. But the little sheep just can't help it. So it hides away, in any way it can, behind the bushes, behind trees, laying down in tall grass, behind other sheep, even underneath its own generous amount of fur. The feeling of this? An endless amount of goosebumps, occurring at random. 

Before I start off saying anything, it is only fair you know that I, on a daily basis, am doing foolish/awkward/weird/questioning things through out my day, let alone life. All which make me feel terribly embarrassed. Me overcoming this emotion has certainly been a thing to conquer. In a certain aspect I have. I have completely accepted the fact that I'm going to be this awkward butterfly for the rest of my life. But I have my days in which I feel like everything I do is just under a big microscope, under deep evaluation, judged by many, and the pressure of that makes me feel like goose-bump nation and frankly that makes me want to stay away, stay away away from everything and anything.  

Feeling sheepish is being embarrassed of your own shadow because it's this or that or it does this or that. Any excuse you make up for feeling sheepish is not good enough. That's what you have to keep in mind, anything your negative self says to frail insecure you is a low blow therefore it is disqualified and not enough. Don't feel insecure or shy about doing what you want, don't think of the results . . . no wait, that's bad advice. Think of the results, for safety reasons but don't over think them for any other reason. *pats back. 

I, more than anyone understands how precious alone time can be or how needed. I understand. Sometimes I use more of my time hidden away, more than I should. I know I'm missing out on whatever I'm missing out on at the moment. I know it. And still it's not enough to bring me out of my little shell. Being sheepish isn't such a bad thing, at least that's what I tell myself. Because in a way it really isn't, it might be just as simple as a different definition for silly or goofy. (The aftermath of those feelings of course). But it sure can keep your from experiencing certain things that eventually turn in to some pretty good memories. 

So next time you're feeling a bit sheepish . . . just remember, goosebumps eventually fade away and they aren't a permanent occurrence. You can shake off the embarrassment, emerge from the shadows of your own comfort and go out there. Conquer your goals and fears. The little sheep was eventually shaved naked, so there is proof one can't be sheepish forever. One can overcome, accept, and walk on on with their head held high not giving any judgement a second thought.  

I hope this helped in more ways than none my sweet reader. 

See You Later.

Embarrassment and art go together. If you’re not willing to be humiliated, your art’s probably too fucking boring.
— Wayne Coyne

Monday, June 2, 2014

Playlist

It's been a very laggy Monday. Yes, I know that is not a word but you all know exactly what I mean. Anyways, I can sense this week is going to go by beyond slow. Not only because I am counting down the days but also because it just simply has that feeling of forever. For that reason this weeks playlist has to be entertaining, up-beat, and fun. Enjoy.


Under The Boardwalk - The Drifters
I don't know what it is about this song that just makes me sing along and feel so groovy while doing so.
Believer - American Authors
Dance. You know you want to.
Reflections - MisterWives
Her voice is butter. The beat demands your hair to be let down and just enjoy this song completely.
Maybe I Might - General Fiasco
Let me just first say that this is one of my favorite bands if not my favorite. Mostly all of their songs are worth listening to. Really they are. This on in particular will have you jumping and forgetting every worry you might have had at the moment.
Nobody's Perfect - Jessie J and Vince Kidd Duet
This song will have you pumped. Woah, look at me using that kind of language. But really, pumped.
A Little Bit Stronger - Sarah Evans
It's country, and it's about heartbreak. But I can't help but feel that this makes me feel a little bit stronger about everything else.
Riptide - Vance Joy
This makes you tap your foot and shimmy and wiggle. 
Brave - Sara Bareilles 
If you haven't heard this song yet, my my, you're missing out. This will literally boost your self-confidence like no other! Definitely one to dance to when no ones looking. *wink wink 

Lyric Hunt.

I better shut my mouth, I better go inside, I better bite my tongue, It's getting hard to decide where this soul went wrong. Catch up it's been too long. 
~
Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way that words do when they settle ‘neath your skin kept on the inside and no sunlight sometimes a shadow wins

See You Later.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

A Sweet Vacation

Hi! How are you today? It's a Sunday, so you must be feeling lazy. I don't blame you it happens. It's happening to me right now actually and I'm enjoying it at full force! 

Okay, enough of the awkward intro. A vacation? Yes, a very much needed vacation! Exactly a week from today I will be on my way to Mexico! I'm truly excited for this trip, as for I haven't been there in about 8 years. I can't wait to see my family as I can't wait to have little adventures with my family. I'm planning to stay there for about a month . . . with that said. I am not completely going to be gone for a month of course I will try to post every now and then. I don't know how well the internet connection might be so bare with me sweet peas. I also am trying to be away from technology once I'm over there, I really want to just experience the vacation without much social media, I need to get away away away. A vacation is a vacation for a lot of things, and I think if you're going to go you should be there 100% no half here half there. Ya get me? 

Anyways, I just wanted to share that bit with you all as it is a huge huge thing for me. I'm so excited! Currently my room is a mess with the whole packing thing, that I am not so excited about. But I will conquer the suitcases, I will.


See You Later.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Courage

Courage is something I'm doing right now, I'm being this feeling, this emotion, right now. It's a scary thing, but being so is also an exciting thing. You must be confused as to what I'm talking about here and that's okay I'll explain at the very end.

Courage -quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., 
without fearbravery.

Think back to a time you thought of yourself as truly courageous. It could be a certain occasion or for someone in particular. Did you feel fear then? Doubt, weak, frail, or like you would fail no matter what? Why is it so hard to conquer those emotions to get to the actual emotion you're searching for? See the thing is, all those questions don't really matter. The actual question that matters is who are you being courageous for? Everyone is entitled to their own courage. Don't ever cheat yourself out of it, believe it or not that is easy to do. Just say no and there you go, you have cheated yourself out of something you deserved. It could be as simple as speaking up, voicing out your opinion, taking credit for something you created or did, saying yes to something crazy and adventurous. Or if you want to go even simpler, simply just talking to people you're too shy to talk to, or hanging out with people you usually avoid, not because you don't like them or anything, because going out makes you feel anxious. You might say, those things don't involve courage, but boy do they. 

For me courage is an emotion I keep away from. I've always felt that if you feel courageous the odds that a large amount of attention is being poured out onto you are great. And for me that is terrifying. Attention for me is like harsh winds for a flying bird. Having anxiety I have cheated myself out of a lot of things. Many emotions for example, courage being one of them. When I have my moments of clarity, I think, how can you be so dumb to let something like that get in the way? Anxiety in itself is its own monster, this post is not about anxiety, this post is about how I'm conquering anxiety with courage as one of my weapons. You can conquer a lot of things with courage.

I'm not going to go into great detail about me just yet, but you should. Go into great detail about you of course. *giggles. Look into all of your dark corners and find out what you could use more courage in. The odds you have a bucket list in your head, even if it's just a little one, are quite high. No, I am not in your head, I made a good guess there didn't I? Bucket lists are great to have! Anything you can think of qualifies, (nothing too dangerous of course, safety first!) life is short, don't let certain things hold you back. 

Starting this blog for me took great amount of courage, it's still too early to tell if I'm doing things right here. *blushes. But I'm doing it! And in a way that's all that matters, just go for it, I'm not telling to close your eyes and leap, I'm telling you close one eye, make sure you'll be okay, and then leap. Constantly ask yourself that, am I okay? Yes I am inferring I talk to myself, all the time actually, it helps. Try it. Are you okay? You can make yourself okay if you want to. Say yes, to little courageous things, the feeling after doing something with no fear, will make you more than okay. 

The war with yourself is one of the toughest wars you'll ever fight. It can be one, and as cheesy as this sounds . . . believe in yourself. Be C O U R A G E O U S. 

Remember, nothing is guaranteed with courage, but it's a great start. If anything it's thee start. 





I have a list. Well, besides a bucket list, I have this other list, a list of emotions, it's kind of a big list. I had the idea that I would pick an emotion every now and then and talk about it. I don't know if it's a good idea yet, but that's what you all are for my sweet readers. Let me know. 

Other than that, I hope this helped in more ways than less. I'll leave you with two of my favorite quotes that inspired me. 


"If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try." - Seth Godin

"But once he recognized the feel of those emotions, their texture, their moisture, the shiver down the back, the quick flash of heat that crosses your brain - Then he was able to say, "Okay, this is fear, step away from it. Step away." - Tuesday's With Morrie by Mitch Albom 

See you later.

Monday, May 26, 2014

Playlist

As promised, this week's playlist. Enjoy!

The Weepies - Red Red Rose


If you can get your hands on the demo version of this song, even better. This is kinda me in a nutshell, so in simple terms my most repeated song of the week. 

The Weepies - Same Changes 


I might be a little too into this artist at the moment so It might show just a bit with this week's playlist. Either way a very lovely song to think things through with.

The Weepies - Be My Honeypie


Okay, last one by them. But really they're all lovely songs, happy and thoughtful ones that will put you in a good mood. 

Smokey Robinson & The Miracles - You Really Got A Hold On Me


A classic, everyone needs a classic sometimes. 

Regina Spektor - Eet


Last but not least, "using your headphones to drown out your mind."

Again, I hope you all enjoy these sweet gentle tunes, I guess I've been stressing out a bit this week and needed more of a calm soothing playlist rather than a crazy wild one. I hope you all did too, not stress I mean but that you needed something a little calm. :) Anyways, let me know if you have some other calm songs in mind, other than that enjoy. 

See you later.

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